Liam Payne on March 1, 2024 in Paris, France.
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Half a year after the death of Liam Payne, his sister Ruth Gibbins remembered her brother in a heartfelt tribute.
“My head is still screaming for you,” Gibbins wrote in an Instagram post shared on Wednesday. “Each morning on waking, I feel like I am plunged underwater, gasping for air that never comes to relieve me. Living without you is impossible, so for now, I exist. I’m learning to laugh or smile in the right places, but mate, it’s exhausting when all I want to do is speak to you.”
Gibbins continued, saying that in the moments she allows herself “to feel love and not just lost,” she is able to “smile at memories of us.” She said that sometimes she can hear her brother “laughing at me walking around like Whoopi Goldberg in Ghost, looking for you everywhere I go.”
She added that although she can’t see him, he’s “always coming through in different ways to put me back on the right path.”
At 17 years old, Payne shot to fame as part of the five-piece group One Direction alongside members Harry Styles, Zayn Malik, Niall Horan, and Louis Tomlinson. Following the release of their debut LP Up All Night in 2011, the band eventually went on hiatus in 2016 and Payne released his first solo album LP1 three years later.
Payne spoke openly about his struggles with alcohol and addiction in the past, sharing that he spent 100 days in rehab in 2023. The singer died on Oct. 16, 2024 after falling from the balcony of a hotel room in Buenos Aires. A Rolling Stone investigation included accounts from his inner circle describing the days before his tragic death.
His family previously released a statement following news of his passing in October. “We are heartbroken,” the Payne family. “Liam will forever live in our hearts and we’ll remember him for his kind, funny and brave soul. We are supporting each other the best we can as a family and ask for privacy and space at this awful time.”
On Wednesday, Liam Payne’s girlfriend Kate Cassidy also shared memories of the singer and opened up about how she is healing while appearing on Jay Shetty’s podcast On Purpose. “Everything reminds me of him in one way or another,” she said. “Seeing those signs make me feel so much more connected and close to him and that I know he’s here and he’s listening to me and he’s not too far.”
In his sister’s post, Gibbins wrote that she still “can’t process what’s happened and the finality of it.” She concluded, “I miss you loudly, quietly and in all the moments inbetween. Love you so much more than these words or my tears are capable of expressing but I know you know this. For now I’ll meet you in my dreams.”
From Rolling Stone US.
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